June 7 2013

I finally figured out how to research adopting out of birth order.  There really isn't much literature on it (No books specifically on the topic, no major articles written on it, etc.), but I finally decided that blended families are similar to adoptive families - often the birth order gets re-arranged when two families come together.  I've found a lot more information using this line of research - mostly it is information about how to blend families well and handle difficulties which can/will arise.  This is pretty much the perfect information for us, because we still believe that a sibling group older than our two year old will be the best fit for our family.  Our son will loose his "oldest sibling" status, but he's an only child, so he'll (probably) keep his "youngest sibling" status too.  The youngest child in the sibling group we adopt will likely loose their "youngest sibling" status to Elliott.

We took another webinar last night - the third part of a three part series on Attachment.  The first two parts were mostly just explaining what attachment is (Which we've researched a lot, so it wasn't much new information)  but the session last night was the "tool kit" which gave ideas of how to facilitate the child's attachment.  They discussed discipline a bit as well - mostly to describe a "Time In" instead of a time out.  Not sure I fully agree with the "Time In" method - which is basically just giving in and giving your child the attention they're calling for by acting out.  I believe adopted children require different methods of discipline (with the trauma and abuse that the children may have suffered, physical discipline, and raising ones voice could potentially harm the child emotionally) but I haven't determined what that discipline will look like in our household yet.

We have set up a visit with a couple we know who have adopted  a little girl from the ministry.  They've had the sweetheart since she was 5 days old, and now the papers have finally been finalized and she's almost 2.  They're welcome to let us see her life book and MCFD file and everything.  Our visit is in just over a week and I'm super excited about it. 

A slide that they showed during the webinar last night had a quote from  Austin O'Malley from 1915 that I really liked: "When you are dealing with a child, keep all your wits about you, and sit on the floor"

I just received an email from the education coordinator at the AFABC letting me know the next AEP (Adoption Education Program) dates! YAY!!!!
"Thanks for your email and inquiry.  We’re currently in the process of getting our webpage updated with the new AEP online information, but I can tell you the dates we have for fall starts.  We will have 3 sessions starting in the fall, each with 2 cohorts of 12 participants.  The start dates are September 5, October 3 & November 7"